No Turning Back!

Round 1 of Bar Mitzvah invitations have gone out!  And there is no A list & B list.  We emailed most of them on Tuesday (after I was up until 5:30am getting them addressed and stamped) and then I got tired.  The rest should be in the mail by tomorrow or the next day.  The paper cut on my tongue is still healing. 

I'm excited because people are already getting the invites (some local people got them the very next day) and people say they turned out really nice, and I agree.  Now on to other important aspects.  People will be expecting to eat.  Maybe I'm doing this all backwards, but I'm talking to caterers now.  I always fall for the first people I talk to and then fall hard if they laugh at my jokes.  I really liked the owner/chef of the first place that called me back.  They are local.  They buy local.  And did I mention the owner laughed at my jokes?

I keep stressing out about all the details, but what I'm really doing is trying to busy myself with them because then I don't have time to get to sappy about what this event really means to me.  But it means a lot.  I can't help it. 

I feel so proud.  My poor kid has been nearly tortured by our Rabbi (I had to write that to see if she's reading this).  He has had to work very hard though.  And I'm sure he would rather be doing anything but sitting in his room chanting in another language when he thinks the rest of the world is having more fun (the rest of the world is not, but you know that age of wishing you were older, and not realizing that responsibility also sucks?). 

I also feel joy beyond words.  I used the word joy on his invitation because that's exactly what I feel.  I knew someday we'd be having a bar mitzvah, and we are almost there.  It's a big milestone for many, but it's an amazing milestone for us.

I feel love (another word used in the invitation).  I love my son.  He still lets me hug him.  He forgives me when I'm not perfect (which is so rare).  I see him with his sisters and I know that he feels loved because he is able to show it also (most of the time).

I feel gratitude.  The gratitude I feel is for so much and for so many.  People we knew well, not so well, and not at all helped us get to this point in our lives.  If you see me crying at the ceremony those tears are probably for you.  My village has been helping me raise my children and my village is the best.  That's all going to be swirling around in my mind on the day of my son's Bar Mitzvah.   

I'm going to need tissues, because of course the gratitude goes beyond people.  I better get back to thinking about a menu.  I'm starting to get too sappy again.